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Doubledown’s Assets Didn’t Sell. Dommage.
By Nick | August 30, 2009
Doubledowners! I have sad news: none of our former publishing company’s assets were seen as worthy of purchase at last week’s bankruptcy auction. What does this mean for those of us still owed money from when our little startup decided to do its best imitation of Tsar Bomba back in January?
Wait, I don’t even need to answer that one, do I? In any case, Folio magazine neatly outlines the same info that I heard from two different sources soon after the actual auction took place. I wouldn’t feel entirely bad, though – never again will most of us have the opportunity to write about, say, the Bugatti Veyron, a vehicle so symbolic of our brief and bygone Gilded Age that it featured a hand-stitched tag on the dashboard that said: “Warning: Operating this vehicle above 200 mph with the windows down may extinguish your limited-edition Bolivar Gold Label and threaten to spill your glass of 1974 Crystal in the dashboard cup holder.”
I kid, of course.
We all have bigger issues to deal with at the moment, anyway. Mine this afternoon mainly revolved around my new next-door neighbors, who decided that the extraordinarily loud load-in of their furniture must be accompanied by a Pussycat Dolls song blasted at top volume.
On repeat.
For three hours.
While I’m trying to complete a major freelancing assignment within the five-hour deadline.
My first impulse was to dust off my copy of Rob Zombie’s Hellbilly Deluxe, the 1812 Overture, Op. 49 of Loud-As-Hell Metal, slip in my earplugs, and then earthquake the hallway with the soothing sounds of “Superbeast” at 200 decibels. But no; as with most first impulses, it was immediately suppressed. But a thousand blessings upon whomever invented sound-dampening headphones.
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